A Closing Door

You said you were selfish
and I felt a pang.
It's a fault yours so rarely,
one I see so clearly in me.
Do you realize?

The door left open
for you to flee my love
you have asked that it be allowed to close:
that I hold you to your word,
that I honor your commitment.

And so I shall.

As my heart closes
around the reality
of you giving yourself to me
and claiming me in return
I am almost satisfied.

Let this truth escape me,
a lingering proof of the unsurpassed trust and faith
I cannot help but place in you,
for you should know the door left open
was for my own comfort.

The regret I have spoken of,
in years to come when looking back,
cuts both ways.

And so I shall overcome my trepidation
That you may not catch me
when I jump into your arms.

and do know that it is not the impact,
the regrouping in a foreign land,
that is the fear that I must conquer.

but rather the heartbreak I would ever feel
should you choose to close your heart to me.

and that truth which cannot be,
as I am right to trust you with my heart,
is the only thought so frightening
that it could give me pause.

Yet with such offerings,
of flowers and devotion
of love so valuable
because of its cherished source,
I would be a fool
not to honor my dearest love
by closing such a hateful door;

Embracing the all of you.